Over the weekend a list of phrases the WWE has allegedly banned from their television programming leaked onto the interweb. It was just another dirt sheet non-story since we probably wouldn’t even notice these terms had been omitted unless they told us. This got me thinking….what are some phrases that we should stop using as fans? We are all guilty of it. Wrestling is filled with a glossary of fun words, and in an age where the curtain is pulled back so much it doesn’t exist anymore, they have all become part of our daily vocabulary. The problem is some of these words get so over or misused that it drives me insane. Every day on social media I see them spewed out all over my timeline. I decided to put together a list of wrestling terms that fans need to retire. Whenever I see these words I get a rabid case of the Douche chills and I just can’t take it anymore!! So where do I begin…..
Let’s start with some low hanging fruit. If 2 guys work for the same company, and face off for the first time, IT IS NOT A DREAM MATCH!! It’s just the first time its happened. We saw it twice during the 2018 Survivor Series with the matchups involving Seth Rollins and Shinsuke Nakamura, and later with Brock Lesnar vs. Daniel Bryan. All we heard was that they were “dream matches.” It makes no sense. It’s not a “dream match” if its actually possible, especially if the participants work for the same promotion. Leave this phrase for matches that we will never seen. I have never seen my 2 all time favorite wrestlers face off and I never will. Until I get Shawn Michaels vs. Sting, all it will ever be is a dream.
Wikipedia defines work rate as, “the in-ring performance level a wrestler puts into their matches, judged by a combination of skill and effort. A wrestler considered talented in the ring has a “high workrate”.” I never understood this ridiculous description of a wrestler. Terms like this didn’t exist when I watched wrestling as a kid. I try and base my like/dislike for a performer based on how they make me feel. So much of wrestling lies in that emotional connection fans have with the talent. Sure Randy Orton may have a high “work rate” or whatever, but I have always found him boring and awful. That doesn’t mean he’s bad, it just means he’s not my cup of tea. We need to get rid of these arbitrary phrases to describe talent, and feed off the emotions that build up when we watch these people perform. That’s the best part about wrestling.
Can we please stop with beginning every tweet of marginal controversy with “unpopular opinion”? It’s not an “unpopular opinion” if you prefer hamburgers over hot dogs, its just your preference. It’s almost like you are trying to pick a twitter fight which just makes you a dirt person. “Hey, look at me I’m saying something saucy.” Who cares if your opinions are popular or not? It only displays lack of conviction when you preface your take with a Surgeon General’s warning. Have confidence in your opinions and own them. Anything less just makes you a fraud.
I understand that “job” is a time honored term in professional wrestling. What I can’t understand is why fans seem to always use that word, or “bury”, whenever one of their favorite stars loses a match. Case in point: Last Sunday at Survivor Series Samoa Joe was the first person eliminated (in quick fashion) during the Raw vs. Smackdown match. Social media got all hot an bothered about this, questioning how could they “bury” Joe like that. He deserves better!! Of course he does, but it doesn’t mean he’s in the proverbial dog house either. Furthermore, recent reports have pointed out that Joe has been nursing some injuries as of late. Maybe thats all they needed him to do. He did his “job”, he wasn’t getting “jobbed.” I feel like every time somebody loses a match on TV the tin foil hat-wearers can’t help but vomit out that that person got “buried.” Relax. It’s a TV show and guys are going to win, and guys are going to lose. It’s not a conspiracy, its just wrestling. Which brings me to…..
Not a day goes by, not a frigging day where I don’t see fans bitch about how “creative” is ruining their favorite wrestler. They aren’t happy with their “booking”. Once again these are words that had no meaning to me when watching wrestling back in the day. I never worried about how a guy was “booked.” I just watched the show, then decided to myself whether said show was good or not. We live in a world where everybody has a platform, a podcast, or a blog. We have fallen into this trap of trying to write the programming as it happen, rather than sitting back and observing. I saw this a few times recently and it struck a nerve. During the Women’s Evolution PPV, a person who runs a wrestling web site was tweeting about the Becky Lynch/Charlotte Flair match. He said something along the lines of, “they are booking this match like Charlotte is going to win, and thats a mistake.” Dude we are 5 minutes into a match!!! How the crap do you know how they are “booking” anything before the match is over. It hasn’t been “booked” yet you Stunad!! The same thing happened during the Daniel Bryan/Brock Lesnar match. The first 7 minutes were a brutal beat down, and it had fans crying out why was this match “booked” last. They were feeding Bryan to an animal. It turned out that to be a fantastic match, and a well told story. We need to start analyzing these shows and matches by the sum of their parts. It’s easy to sit on our butts and play Monday morning quarterback, waxing poetic how we could do it better than “creative.” They will never fit your personal agenda. The best we can do is find the positives in what we are seeing, and enjoy it as much as you can. (Note: This is NOT a dig at the “Revisionist Booking” podcast with RJ and Michael Berry. They have unique takes on past shows and do a tremendous job. Keep it up guys!)
I get it. We all wish we could work for our favorite wrestling promotions, and write every segment for every show. Unfortunately the world doesn’t work that way. These terms bring unnecessary negativity to the wrestling fan base. If you have a problem with this list, too bad. I pride myself on trying to build a positive wrestling fan community. I can only hope you can join me in my journey. Wrestling, like this article, is meant to be fun. Taking yourself too seriously only leads to frustration.
Until next time friends. Have a Happy Thanksgiving!